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Wonder Women: The Parenting Role of Contemporary females

She is a fighter, a ‘warrior’, a mythical character, a ‘goddess’. She is made of love, but she knows pain and she is willing to ‘make sacrifices’. This strong and yet gentle creature has management skills and bear the power of life. She is the ultimate Wonder Woman. She is a contemporary mom.

Beyond this poetic description that is present in many definitions of motherhood, what is the role of contemporary women in parenting?

One of the most popular words of our time is evolution. We’ve heard a lot about how much our generation has evolved, made progress in numerous areas. We live in a time where technology has fundamentaly revolutionized our way of life, our way of communicating with each other.

And yet, it would seem that one of the oldest role in life has remained the same: being a mom. Despite ongoing challenges, women remain the cornerstone in a child’s life. What can explain such stagnation in parenting?

This month of May, we have invited a group of women from four different countries (USA, Canada, Brazil, and Dominican Republic) to share their thoughts on motherhood. From this talk, it turns out  that motherhood is a one of the most difficult and demanding jobs in the world.

This is the tale of motherhood, it is a labor of love, a love made of sacrifices and self-denial. The mother appears to be the most prominent parental figure in a child’s development.

Being a mom means love. Children, no matter how old they are, and even if they won’t admit it, always want their parents’ approval and love especially when they think they did something wrong. It is important as a mom to let them know that they are loved no matter what”, says Rachel Frédérique Bruno

Many questions are raised from our Talk on Motherhood.

  • What is a woman’s role in a child’s life cycle?
  • Are women more involved in children’s education than men? If yes, why?
  • Do social pressure compel women to be more involved in raising children than men?

A study from Pew Research argues that mothers today face tougher challenges than men. The study consisting of about 2020 interviews conducted among Americans suggests that contemporary women with children live through tougher times than mothers from three decades ago. Women in present times are also more criticized about their lack of good parenting skills.

“Mothers are seen as having the more difficult job, but they are also judged more harshly than are fathers.” – (Pew Research)

How 18 women from different generations depict the female role in parenting


Generation X and Y
Generations of women – X and Y

Many women from our Talk bring forth similar reasoning to the Pew Research study. One of the hardest truth is that women’s condition has progressed, allowing them to be on a par with men in several social areas. Therefore, the female parent’s social responsibility has increased while her duty at home has remained the same, thus the motherly Wonder Woman figure.

“Being a mother in 2017 is very different from being a mother in the 80’s. Most mothers these days work full-time or are full-time students. So, it’s hard to manage, but we are always trying to make it happen,” observes Belise Nda, a millennial mom.

This thought also echoes in Rachel Frédérique Bruno‘s statement. “It was always interesting to see, when growing up, how my mom would deal with a husband and 5 kids. None of us felt neglected. Even now that we are all grown up, she is still there for all of us, and she is never tired. This is love.”

Deisy Toussaint defines motherhood as ‘being a goddess‘, a mythical character who is strong enough to endure unbearable pain to bear life and “gives birth, whom with love and pain brings a being to the world to continue the course of generations.”

To Josephine Keyamo the role of a mom is to provide ‘unconditional love‘, guidance, “providing for” your children for future and longer term. Josephine recalled “Mum gave me money for deposit for buying my first home, I intend doing same for my child.”

A woman’s role as a parent is then to be able to love her children unconditionally, to make sacrifices for the well-being of her children and yet to provide for them financially. Isn’t it what today’s society is expecting from a female parent?

What is the role of a woman in the child’s life cycle?

It’s to be the wonder woman in a child’s life. This idea is predominant in most testimonies.

“Being a mom means stop living for yourself and breathe for your child(en). It means being always ready to make sacrifices for the sake of the child (en)’s well-being,” argues Farah Cherlyne Rondeau.

Phaiede Lafleur conquer by saying that on top of everything else, “I’ve come to the conclusion that motherhood is about SACRIFICE. The sacrifice that I’ve seen mothers made so that their children could have a better life is INCOMPARABLE.”

It’s also “about the positive influence a woman has on each child in her life; it’s about giving love in a way that isn’t fleeting—you love, unwaveringly”, points out Mimie L.

It is an ongoing fight to raise the citizens of tomorrow.

Carolina Eichler confides that “being a mother means a love greater than everything and being a warrior to face all the tribulations of everyday life”.

While a woman has to wear so many hats as a parent, it is normal to wonder about the male role in a child’s life.

Veronique Dolce is advocating for a stricker and past form of motherhood where “all mothers knew that being a mother was the most important job in the world”. In her eyes many contemporary “mothers fell to assume responsibility and that’s why now we have a big trend of single father”.

  • Do fathers have it as tough as mothers?
  • Do fathers have to make equal sacrifices, while being equally loving, caring, and present in their children’s life?

This is unlikely that fathers face the same social pressure to be supermen or wonder dads as many studies indicate.

In a study about Single Motherhood from the American Prospect, single motherhood is portrayed as being the norm since the 1960’s while single fatherhood is not that common. Some seem to literaly attribute the sole responsibility of birthing and raising children to women.

A conservative politician named Charles Murray said in the 1990’s about the father’s role that: “As far as I can tell, he has approximately the same causal responsibility as a slice of chocolate cake has in determining whether a woman gains weight.”

It would seem that almost three decades later women haven’t reached parity with men when it comes to raising children. Still today, the mother is more likely to be held accountable than the father.

Generation Z millennial (1989-2004) standpoint on motherhood



  • Should the fact that women bear life increase her responsibility in child-rearing, diminishing the father’s role?
  • Could it be that unconciously women assign themselves the tougher parenting role?
  • Or do social rules confine women in the tougher areas of parenting, giving male parents the freedom to thrive in society?

The answers to these questions are not clear, but let’s see what our young millennial participants think about that.

Bing Yao expresses strong opinion about the role a mom should play in a child’s life in the present-day. She is advocating for social changes on behalf of motherhood.

“Today, there is increasingly tighter links between motherhood and social environment, that mom is no longer the only one to decide how to behave so that a positive effect could be produced. The mass media, the school, other organizations and of course the husband and other family members could exert great influence and therefore influence [the way a mother is] dealing with motherhood,” argues the young millennial.

Rivka Louis narrates tales of sacrifices her single mom made for her well-being and her siblings while denying her own happiness. “She was always afraid to bring a guy home because she had mostly girls and she didn’t want anything to happen to us“, recalls the young woman.

To Marianna Hernandez, the role of female parents is to be “a role model for your young ones. If you want to raise good human beings you want to start with yourself.”

The idea of role model is also shared by millennial Jayneisha Ivory. In her eyes, motherhood is about “making sure you are a role model and a person that your children can look up to in the future” and taking seriously “your responsibility as a parent”.

Ruth Tania points out that mothers have an obligation to care for and protect their children.

“Motherhood I think it’s as soon as you feel the needs to protect someone else as if it was a part of your body, I can even say you”, argues this young millennial.

Naya Ileran‘s approach to motherhood is the ultimate love, loving your children more than yourself. “Being a mom is suddenly caring for that one person, and loving that person more than you love life itself, it’s being selfless, it’s being tired but always smiling”, says the young woman.

Tina Roberts (pseudonym) admits that her mother ‘has inspired’ her to ‘focus on her career’.

“I saw how many things you actually can’t do because you have children, and my mother had 5 kids and I could see how it impedes a woman from building her own dreams.”

“It’s certainly harder to do many things with children, but not impossible. So she certainly inspires me to do better for myself and the world around me”, adds the young woman.

Finally, Magdalande Pierre rejoins her millennial group when it comes to the role of mothers in parenting.

“Motherhood to me means to take the responsibility to care for a being mentally and physically; to teach that being how to take care of themselves and become independent. Most all to give them guidance, love, and all the other qualities that they would need to get through life.”

In conclusion, most participants in our Talk on Motherhood depict the role of women in parenting as literaly being a Wonder Woman.

Older women focus on the needs to know how to ‘love unconditionaly’, to care mentaly, physically, and financially for her children, to ‘protect them’, to ‘sacrifice’ herself for the ‘well-being of her children’. Young millennials see mothers as a ‘role model’, someone capable of taking ‘responsibility’ and who is always ‘present’ for her children.

So now to answer another question raised from this talk:

Do social pressure compel women to be more involved in raising children than men?

There is not a definitive answer to this question. However, we can refer to some internationaly social pointers to provide some leads to solutions. Looking broadly at the world, there is in every society rules that women are supposed to follow.

Just think about the widespread belief of maternal instinct, this belief that women has biological clock compelling them to become mothers. Some beliefs go as far as to say that mothers has a sixth sense to know what’s going on with their children even when children are far away.

On the other hand, it seems that there is no such a thing as paternal instinct. There is nonetheless a wide array of worldwide psychologists and studies to still demonstrate that motherhood and child-rearing are a woman’s obligation.

One Japanese study maintains that “Maternal Instinct Is Wired Into the Brain” as reported by the New York Times. Another one pretends that “men have lower level of testosterone when they become a father” and that taking care of their children “may accelerate the decline of the male hormone”. (Source: coparents.com).

Does society compel women into confined and pre-defined parenting roles? The answer seems to be a definitive YES. Women are seen as care-givers, but more as nurses than doctors in the sense that they are being dictated how to provide this care, this love to their children.

Once again, the woman’s right is denied.

  • Shouldn’t a woman be free to decide to have kids or not, without being shamed by society?
  • If a woman decides to become a mother, should this choice happens at the expense of her happiness?
  • Shouldn’t mothers be allowed to pursue dreams like anybody else?

What can women do to avoid feeling guilty for not being able to perform as wonder moms


Motherhood and parenting in general are indeed about love, sacrifices, and compromises to bring children in the world and guide them through adulthood. Our participants have been right on point in highlighting these parenting traits.

The world has changed and technological revolutions have allowed women to pursue in the same time professional careers and family life. So many boundaries have moved around, and yet it has become financially more difficult to raise children in single-income home. Women, either to fulfill their dreams or out-of-choice, are now more and more working-moms or full-time students while raisng children.

How to avoid being guilty? Some participants provide insightful steps to deal with this well-known parenting issues.

To Sara Lazare motherhood means, “to raise my children as best as I can so that they can be the best that they can be, filled with joyful memories.”

Mothers are humans, so all they can do is doing their best.  Women have to accept that as human beings they are going to make mistakes along the parenting way. We have to accept these facts, learn and grow from our mistakes and transfer this wisdom to our children.

  • How can you truly love others if you don’t learn to love yourself, take care of yourself?
  • How can you truly forgive others if you don’t learn to forgive yourself and accept that you can make mistakes?

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Millennials and Motherhood: A Total New Venture

How Millennial and Women from the 70’s See Motherhood


You may have heard a lot about millennials! Some even said millennials are a myth. For others, millennials represent a whole new breed of human beings. They completely think and do things differently from older generations.

This Mother’s Day and throughout the month of May, we are inviting different generations of women to confront their thoughts on motherhood. This is our way of celebrating mom and reflect on the colossal job of ‘being a mom’.

First-generation millennials (1981 -1991) and young millennials (1991 – 2001) face older generations of women (1970 – 1980) in a diverse shock of thoughts.

So far, respondents from different countries have shared insightful, honest, and beautiful views on the institution of motherhood.

Discover all these amazing women and read their testimonies.

COMMON TRAITS


Mom’s love is priceless

If I were to put a price on my mother’s love, I would say that she loved us infinity times infinity, and that we love her infinity times infinity, I wouldn’t trade her for the world.”, says Rivka, a young millennial from Boston (USA).

Her statement somehow resonates in all participants’ opinion, whether they were young millennials, second-generation millennials or from older generations of women. When it comes to a mom’s love millennials prove to think just like older generations of women.

They tend to understand that a mom’s job is difficult and that there may be time when a mom doesn’t treat their children as expected, that life can get in the way and cheat kids from some precious mom’s time. But, whatever happened, in the end, moms do what they do out of love.

Sara, a New York mom from the decade 1970–1980 simply sums it up like this, “As humans, of course we get on each other’s nerves, but, the love we share is infinite…”

Finally, Ruth Tania, another young millennial from Ottawa (Canada), explains why a mom’s love is priceless.

“What price can I put on my mother’s love? There is none. I can’t compare my mom’s love. Whatever how many times I have disappointed her, I made her cry, she still loves me, takes care of me. And never loses hope on me. She always wanted the best for me. Even after everyone stops believing in me she remains the one on my side. ”

Reinventing motherhood?

Most participants and particularly millennials believe that motherhood should be reinvented and for various reasons.

Such thoughts clearly echoes with Bing, a first-generation millennial from Toronto (Canada), who believes that “we need to rethink the role moms play in our time“.

“Definitely it should be reinvented, as the world has so overwhelmingly changed. It is no longer the confined environment where moms and kids can stay close without border from the outside. Today, the mass media, and internet and the work-life style have put much pressure on the so-called motherhood, ” adds Bing

For Magdalande, a young millennial from Chicago (USA), it’s also a definite YES. She reasons that “motherhood is outdated because there are some people who still feel that motherhood only applies to the person who gave birth. If we take for example kids that lost their mother at a young age, they could get that motherly from a stepmother, a family member, a teacher, and etc.… who is willing to because it’s not an easy job.”

The idea of rethinking motherhood is also present in many other millennials’ testimonies. Belise, a first-generation millennial from Ottawa (Canada), believes that motherhood is already going through changes. “Being a mother in 2017 is very different from being a mother in the 80’s. Most mothers these days work full-time or are students full-time,” mentions Belise.

For Mimie, a woman from the decade 1970-1980, “motherhood is evolving because there are many women who either choose to become mothers in ways that society may deem non-traditional or decide to not conceive a child for myriad reasons. A woman carrying her own child is a beautiful, magnificent experience to witness and to go through. But, to me, it is just one of many forms: motherhood is about the positive influence a woman has on each child in her life; it’s about giving love in a way that isn’t fleeting—you love, unwaveringly.”

Similarly, Tina, a young millennial argues that “we need motherhood to be more encompassing of working moms, and be more supportive of women who are mothers”.

However some participants agree that motherhood is everything but outdated.  An opinion clearly shared by Rachel Frédérique Bruno, a Florida mom.

“Motherhood would never be outdated. Because, for me, mothers have a common goal: happiness of their children by providing, protecting and caring for them,” says Rachel.

Our participants show that both generations of millennials (1981-1991 & 1991-2001) think that motherhood should be reinvented. Nevertheless, the hope to have children of their own is as present as it used to be in older time. We humans particularly women seem to have this need to transfer our love to another human being, to cherish, protect them and push them in life. Could this be what is called the maternal instinct or parental instinct?

Diversity of thoughts: the meaning of motherhood

When asked what being a mom means to them, there is common thread in participants’ answer: loving and caring.

Motherhood Participants - Decade 1971-1981
Generation of women from decade 1971-1981 – VoiceOasis image

Carolina, a woman from Janeiro (Brazil) who was born during the decade 1971 – 1981, defines motherhood as “a love greater than everything and being a warrior to face all the tribulations of everyday life.”

To other participants, motherhood has also other meanings. For instance, Deisy, a first-generation millennial from Santo Domingo (DR) , compare mom to goddess.

“For me, being a mother is to be a goddess, a goddess who gives birth, whom with love and pain brings a creature to the world to continue the course of generations,” says Deisy (translated from Spanish, see participants’ testimonies for original text.

Cherlyne, a woman from the 1971-1981 generation from Florida (USA), also brings a new perspective to the meaning of motherhood. She sees being a mom as  making sacrifices for your children. “It means being always ready to make sacrifices for the sake of the child (en)’s well-being“, says Cherlyne.

Finally, motherhood is “being a role model for your young ones,” says Mariana, a young millennial. She adds, “If you want to raise good human beings you want to start with yourself.”

We are here confronted to such a diverse array of thoughts when it comes to motherhood. It’s about loving, caring, and making sacrifices for the benefit of another human being. Motherhood is also seen as an institution that surpasses any normal woman or all women put together. It’s about being a warrior or take on a goddess character.

Finally, it is about “Making sure you are a role model and a person that your children can look up to in the future“, to quote Jayneisha, a young millennial from Chicago.

Whatever their stance, millennials and older women alike agree that being a mom is about loving and caring.

  • How do you see motherhood in today’s world?
  • Do you agree with participants’ opinions on motherhood?

Click here for updates on this motherhood project and join the conversation.

Inspirational Moms

Through this exercise we learn that moms are pretty awesome. Most participants confess that they have been inspired by their moms to create a family of their own. On top of that several women mentions having been inspired by both their moms and their grand-ma.

This can be seen through Veronique‘s words, a woman from the 1971-1981 decade.

“My mom and grandmother are the only reason I want to be a mom because I want to share with my kids all that I received from them,” reveals Veronique

Naya, a young millennial from Florida (USA) also think the same way. “Yes, my mother absolutely inspired me to have my own family one day“, confides the young woman.

Josephine, an Ottawan woman from the 1970’s brings a different approach. She admits never even thought about motherhood before she actually became a mom.

“I love (d) mum dearly but never thought about kids that way as I was always independent free-spirited who never saw myself as a mother even after marrying and endured this. When my daughter was conceived, I did not think I was ready or would be as good as mum. My husband and I got my mum to come stay with us to help care for my daughter for the first year and this, was invaluable.”

To conclude, not all women feel inspired to have a family of their own. Some women think motherhood definitely needs to be rethought. And if one day they have children they want their experience to be different from their grand-mothers’ or mothers’ as echoed in Bing’s testimony.

“I have been actually much discouraged by seeing the life my mom has led all these years. It seems to me, she has fired her own life to fuel the operation of whole family, by working every day outside and doing household chores inside. She has no time for herself and becomes quick-tempered and has developed much grudge as time goes by. She seems lost at the fact that why she has done so well as a mom and wife but still not happy at all,” confides the young woman from Toronto (Canada)

Similarly,  other women just don’t want to have children and that’s okay because motherhood should also be about freedom. The freedom to reach deep inside yourself and find out where you truly belong.


Note: This blog will be updated throughout the month of May to include new participants testimony and keep the discussion alive.

Are you a millennial? A women from 1970’s? Are you interested in the topic of motherhood, either in rethinking it or coming back to old values? Join the discussion.

Stay tune for participants complete answers and to find out how millennials’ view on motherhood differ from older generations of women.

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A Life’s Secret: How Human Connections Lead to Real Success


Very often we are asking ourselves how different our life could have been if we had followed a different path. Every day we are questionning our decisions. What if, what if….

An author had had this call 16 years ago where he was at a path of his life when out of nothing a simple, normal gesture, an everyday decision had changed his life forever: opening the TV.

follow-the-path-1310738-639x764_Freeimages.com
We never know where our path can lead us.

Life is a series of decision that we make every second of our lives. Even when we are not always aware of it, every decision we make affects our life and others’. Even simple gesture like drinking a glass of water. This is how Author Mitch Albom had had his life-changing experience.


“All the values that you aspire to in life. All the things you want to accomplish in your life, the lessons you want to teach other people in your life, the legacy you want to leave behind after you leave this Earth can all be done within the family that you create and continue to spread out to the rest of the world long after you’re gone.” – Mitch Albom (Source: Forbes)

In an interview with Forbes, The Moment That Changed Mitch Albom’s Life, Albom shared this wisdom that he had learnt from his late teacher, mentor, and friend, Morrie.

This is an interview full of insights into life itself, a refreshing note on human connection leading to real success.

Albom has raised questions that we ask ourselves everyday. He mentioned that he had seen his teacher on TV, talking about his own upcoming death and that’s how he got reconnected to this friend and mentor after 16 years. That is also how he got to honour a promise that he had not been keeping for 16 years.

If he hadn’t turned on the TV to this specific channel at this exact moment, what would have happened? However, he did and this simple gesture, this everyday choice had turned into a wonderful story, a famous book: Tuesdays With Morrie!

We often question ourselves about decisions we make or don’t make. If I had taken this road, what would have happened to me? If I hadn’t met this person, where would I be today? If I studied something different, if I went to college, if I went on that trip, if I chose a different career path…. So many ifs and we cannot help wonder if a decision or another would have neared us to nirvana.

The interview also offers an open window on life and death. For instance, our reluctance to talk about or to even consider that we are going to die one day. We prefer thinking that we are immortal and act like it, giving us good reasons to ignore others’ pain, others’ feelings.

We act as if we don’t care while inside of us we are so aware of this fact that we are always in a marathon, trying to win as much as we can before the fatal day.

Unfortunately, we are not aware of how much important opportunities we are missing on to be better human beings, to make time for our loved-ones, to make our passage on this Earth worthwhile. We are actually missing on opportunities that could have made us on a successful path, probably on the life path we secretly desire and deserve. We are often oblivious to the fact that helping others result in successful communities.

It is important that we truly ask ourselves how we would like to be remembered and act like it.

The greatest part of the interview is to find out that Morrie had been a teacher and a mentor to Albom even when he had been ignoring him. Morrie had passed on to Albom the greatest teaching of all: the wisdom of life, which is living through the next generation.

We are not immortal, we are here on this Earth right now for a reason. It’s a time to learn, then to teach what we have learnt, to pass on the wisdom to the next generation. It’s important to pay attention to our surrounding, to people next to us. It’s important to value each other. Most of all to confide our knowledge to the future generation. And Mitch believes that your own children is where to start. A family is where to start building the society of tomorrow.

This is not an easy job to learn to pay attention to and to value others as Mitch Albom had learnt himself. It is easier when you have someone, a mentor to teach you the way of life. Needless to say it is a difficult job when you don’t have someone around you can learn from. However, it is not impossible. Read the Forbes interview here for more insights.

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Living in two worlds: How new #tech is shaping human minds


”I think the main issue of technology to humans is that these devices break up limitations.” – Bing Yao

In this piece the writer  shares her concern in a genuine text that everyone needs to read and reflect on.
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The puzzling road of women hairstyle


Version française

Did you know that behind every hairstyle there’s a story? I, as a woman wasn’t fully aware of that. At first, I wanted to write a piece about pressure that sociocultural and religious groups put on women to conform to certain looks such as ways to dress and to style their hair.